Have you ever encountered your fear, anxiety and insecurities, face to face? It is not only hard but painful to take inventory of our insecurities and weaknesses. It is very hard and painful to know and feel not accepted by people around. In such a situation, it is next to impossible to remain responsive and stop reactive. In such situations we are emotionally disturbed and feel to withdraw and escape. If we are not willing to accept and accommodate disturbance and discomfort, well then we’ll never grow.

If we can’t grow as a total individual or as a total person, our relationships can’t grow. We’ll be stuck wanting approvals, acceptance, not real relationship - which is the ability to be truly show our true face that belongs to people around.

When something is very taxing in any relationship, then we perceive as a sign that something is drastically wrong – we switch to reactive mode. We see things going wrong. We fail in every aspect of relationship – communication, confidence, attitude, dealing with emotions and so on… Relationship is to grow and not to get trapped in pleasing others and creating a feel good atmosphere. If we never value responsibility, accountability and commitment in relationship, it is not easy to grow and face our own imperfections.

Our emotional discomfort reveals that that everything is not good in our relationships. It expresses our inability to handle our emotional disturbances. Relationships are an opportunity to grow better and better. It forces us to face our vices and when it does, we have a choice to make. Let us not hold others responsible for the things in our life. Let us face it with integrity, own up to our shortcomings and change for ourselves and our relationship.

To relate is the best opportunity for self – growth.